I love all holidays. Any holiday to decorate, celebrate, dress up in a theme, or give creative presents- I am in. This might be something I got from my mom, because without fail, every year, she would give me a valentines day present. It might be because she felt bad for me, because before the ripe age of 23, I never had a boyfriend. I came close once, when I was 15- but I dumped the kid a day before February 14th. Crushed his poor little heart- he even wrote a song for me... on a paper lunch bag. But other than that, Valentines day was reserved for my parents to give me candy I 100% did not need- and a stuffed animal of some sorts. Although these gifts came from my parents, I still loved Valentines Day.
Everyone that says they hate Valentines day because they don't have anyone, or they think its stupid- come on, get a grip. Its just a fun day to tell people you love them, and wear red. Lighten up- sometimes its fun to leave this dark, global warming world, and live in a pink, candy world. And everyone needs someone to tell them they are loved. So tomorrow- tell everyone you love them- even if you just kind of only like them. Spread the cheer. Laugh a little harder at someones joke, give up your seat to someone who needs it, or even just the smallest thing, smile back at someone who smiles at you. This is turning into a rant. But I think people should just be a little more loving and caring. There is always someone, somewhere that is having a harder time than you. So love the Valentines day. Get struck by cupids arrow, nothing bad is gonna happen.
In other news- I decided to grow my hair out for locks of love. So many people in my life have been effected by cancer lately, and in the past- so its time to give apart of myself, the least I can do. I did the breast cancer walk a few years ago, and now its time to give part of myself again. Consider it my Valentines day treat to the world.
Peace, Love, and Eat a candy heart-
B
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
Monday, February 11, 2013
Yea- its been awhile.
I have come to the conclusion that I am a binge writer with this blog. I turn to this portal when my words can not form from my mouth to come out in complete sentences or even make sense. Just like sometimes you cant make sense of things going on.
You try to add them up- logically, 1+1+1=3. That's what should happen. But what about when 1+1+1=8? What about when the world around me does not make sense? What happens when I almost break down, knowing that I need to pull it together, when my knees buckle, when I cannot get a word out of my mouth, when my airways close up to the point of choking, and all that appears are tears. Tears, upon tears, upon tears. They never end. At some point I think they subside- and then, just one thing happens, and there they come, like I have never cried once in my life.
I am known to have a lot of feelings- being emotional makes me who I am. I feel for others- I try to include everyone, I feel pain, even when someone else is hurting. I smile with everything I have, and in turn, cry with everything that I am.
Thats just me. And for some reason, the mess that I have become over the past few months is functioning. I am not quite sure why or how, but it just works.This emotional state of uneasiness- of always what will tomorrow brings, has become a normal state. Between new jobs (yes again), family ups and downs, hurricanes, snow storms, bone suprs, and other things- every day is a guessing game. Who knows whats going to happen. And I am ok with that- but I am also ok with the fact that today, just today- hardcore sucked.
So. I cried about it. Plain old cried. I am an ugly crier. But the tears help me make sense. And I am lucky enough to have someone to make me laugh through the headache, redeyes, and stuffy nose that come from crying. And once the crying stops- the laughing starts.
peace, love and utter disarray,
b
Also- no promises that I will write more consistently But, like I have before- saying that I will try. Gotta find myself again once the rollercoaster comes to a coast. Wouldn't that be nice? But then again... coasting might be boring.
You try to add them up- logically, 1+1+1=3. That's what should happen. But what about when 1+1+1=8? What about when the world around me does not make sense? What happens when I almost break down, knowing that I need to pull it together, when my knees buckle, when I cannot get a word out of my mouth, when my airways close up to the point of choking, and all that appears are tears. Tears, upon tears, upon tears. They never end. At some point I think they subside- and then, just one thing happens, and there they come, like I have never cried once in my life.
I am known to have a lot of feelings- being emotional makes me who I am. I feel for others- I try to include everyone, I feel pain, even when someone else is hurting. I smile with everything I have, and in turn, cry with everything that I am.
Thats just me. And for some reason, the mess that I have become over the past few months is functioning. I am not quite sure why or how, but it just works.This emotional state of uneasiness- of always what will tomorrow brings, has become a normal state. Between new jobs (yes again), family ups and downs, hurricanes, snow storms, bone suprs, and other things- every day is a guessing game. Who knows whats going to happen. And I am ok with that- but I am also ok with the fact that today, just today- hardcore sucked.
So. I cried about it. Plain old cried. I am an ugly crier. But the tears help me make sense. And I am lucky enough to have someone to make me laugh through the headache, redeyes, and stuffy nose that come from crying. And once the crying stops- the laughing starts.
peace, love and utter disarray,
b
Also- no promises that I will write more consistently But, like I have before- saying that I will try. Gotta find myself again once the rollercoaster comes to a coast. Wouldn't that be nice? But then again... coasting might be boring.
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